The big Why -- at least one of them

Why did this happen to me?

I don’t mean why I got the transplant. That’s clear as Culligan Water; because I smoked and developed COPD. I was sick enough to need a transplant and, in the opinion of the doctors, a good candidate to survive it. And the health care I needed before, during, and after the transplant was covered by my wife’s insurance through her employer.

I don’t mean why I decided to get a transplant, either. I’m reminded of that every time I open the Shand’s Adult Lung Transplant book I keep my daily records in. It’s on a note I wrote to Harriet while we were still staying at the Camellia Rose Inn during my recovery: I got the transplant because I wanted to spend more time with you.

I mean…why me? Why did I get a second chance?

As I wrote in last year’s Christmas card I now believe for certain that there’s a hand behind our human existence. And there is a reason why I’m still here, something I need to do. When we discovered my mother has Alzheimer’s and moved her into our house, I thought I felt that hand. This spring when I had the opportunity, through the American Lung Association, to speak to high school students about the dangers of smoking, I felt is again. Now, I think those were just warm ups to give me confidence. I’m sure there are a lot of reasons I’m still here, but none more important than the next one. I have a chance to be care giver, at least for a few weeks, to my care giver.

If you’re a reader of this blog, you’ll know that Harriet, my wife, recently had good news about an MRI. The spot on her liver turned out to be what her doctor called just a blood blister. It was a great relief to us because she has already been diagnosed with a small renal carcinoma on her kidney. Now we can look forward to her surgery this coming Wednesday to remove that kidney, and any chance that the cancer can spread. Without going though radiation or chemotherapy. She should be out of the hospital in five days --and in the hands of nurse Larry. Afterall, I said I wanted to spend more time with her. :)

Since I mentioned the 2008 Christmas card, here’s what I wrote:

I always wondered about miracles;

Christmas, Easter, the Universe.

This year I saw one up close.

Small to be sure

But I have no question now

There is a hand behind

Our human existence

And I have been lucky enough

If for only a moment to be cradled

In His loving embrace